The Peculiar Neurodegenerative Inhabitants of the Kazawa Atoll
1. I haven’t seen Royal Tenenbaums in a couple years and I watched it again today. I forgot how good it was. Wes Anderson is one hell of a filmmaker and can write an amusing mix of dry humor and deeper (existential?) insight. And whoever helps pick the music for his films kicks ass too: Nick Drake, Vince Guaraldi, Van Morrison, Elliott Smith, etc. Lastly, Gweneth Paltrow is freakishly beautiful in the movie. And here are some noteworthy quotes from the movie:
2. There should only be one “World’s Best Grandpa” or any other “World’s Best…” shirt in circulation, for obvious reasons.
3. It irritates me to see girls sit in the middle of truck cabins just to be closer to their boyfriends. And perhaps I’m just a little jaded about obvious outward expression of affection, but it just seems so pointless. At the least it’s annoying for the driver. Being unnecessarily crammed up against your loser of a boyfriend, making it difficult for him to drive is ridiculous when there is a perfectly good seat to the right that will seat your insecure, hyperaffectionate ass. Affection, like all other good things, is best when done in moderation. So that ten minute drive from the gas station to Burger King will not solidify your relationship or make it any better because you touch his leg while he’s driving. So to all you lame girls who do this: ride in the passenger's seat; don’t ride bitch (which is aptly named).
4. Listen up uncool people, have I got some good news for you! I’ve noticed some really cool people this week and have picked up on their speech habits. Do/say these things and in no time you will be much cooler:
- “I’ve always been considered an asshole for about as long as I can remember, but that’s just kind of my style.” “I don't think you're an asshole, Royal. I just think you're kind of a son of a bitch.”
- “Let’s shag ass.”
- “I’m very sorry for your loss, your mother was a terribly attractive woman.” [Royal talking to Uzi and Ari about their recently deceased mother.]
- “I’ll talk some jive like you’ve never heard.” It’s important to note that when I first watched this in the theaters I almost crapped myself during this scene.
2. There should only be one “World’s Best Grandpa” or any other “World’s Best…” shirt in circulation, for obvious reasons.
3. It irritates me to see girls sit in the middle of truck cabins just to be closer to their boyfriends. And perhaps I’m just a little jaded about obvious outward expression of affection, but it just seems so pointless. At the least it’s annoying for the driver. Being unnecessarily crammed up against your loser of a boyfriend, making it difficult for him to drive is ridiculous when there is a perfectly good seat to the right that will seat your insecure, hyperaffectionate ass. Affection, like all other good things, is best when done in moderation. So that ten minute drive from the gas station to Burger King will not solidify your relationship or make it any better because you touch his leg while he’s driving. So to all you lame girls who do this: ride in the passenger's seat; don’t ride bitch (which is aptly named).
4. Listen up uncool people, have I got some good news for you! I’ve noticed some really cool people this week and have picked up on their speech habits. Do/say these things and in no time you will be much cooler:
- Call CDs “albums”.
- Refer to movies as “films”.
- Songs are no longer songs; they are “tracks” or “cuts”.
- Wear sunglasses where it is highly impractical to do so.
posted by Ryan at 12:52 AM
2 Comments:
4. Hey! I call albums "albums"! I call films "films"! I must be cool! Am I one of the cool people you're talking about? I don't see how I couldn't be. Alas, I do call songs "songs" when not in the context of a whole album. Also alas, I don't ever wear sunglasses... stupid fraggin' glasses.
Hey, how about calling pictures "photos" or "photographs". I think this one is especially cool because a "picture" can be any number of different things, so it eliminates a lot of uncool ambiguity.
#3.) Ya, you are jaded. Unless it's your girl all up in your grill while you're driving your bench-seated half ton, don't worry about it. She's probably got her hand down his pants and I'm sure he doesn't mind.
Plus The Royal Tenenbaums kick ass. Probably my top 3 movies of all time. I'm with you there, buddy. The quotes you picked were great too.
Should have included Royal's response to #1: Royal's heartfelt "Well, I really appreciate that."
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