Gas

I'm sadly aware that I am getting a gallon and a half of gas for five bucks, when back in the day--by which I mean earlier this year--the quick five dollar gas break could at least hold me over for a day and a half, maybe even two. Now that same five dollars will barely get me enough gas to go home and review my checking account to see how much money I just wasted by going home.

But the only thing more ridiculous than the hourly-inflating gas prices are the daily news reports of how ridiculous the gas prices are. I know how much I have to spend on gas and I'm not happy about it, but I don't need some toothless hillbilly from Madera screaming "I just can't believe how bad these prices are. I can't afford to do anything," as he struggles to pump gas because the camera crew is shoving a microphone in his face. And these pointless interviews are daily. Without fail, every time I've watched the news for the past three weeks there has been a rookie news reporter interviewing some poor schmuck at the gas pump, asking him his feelings on the increasing gas prices, as if his opinion meant anything. But everyone's opinion is the same: high gas prices are shitty. Nobody is going to say "High gas prices? I'M FOR 'EM."

So if I ever get asked about my feelings on high gas prices on television I'll just eff with them and respond with Mitch-like execution "I HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT KOALA BEARS ARE INCREDIBLY CUTE," finish pumping my gas, and drive away happily knowing that, like everyone else, my opinion on the matter doesn't mean shit.